Eat Before You Go

I read recently that Cirque du Soleil, the innovative Canadian acrobatics troupe, is planning to join the posthumous Michael Jackson business with two shows based on his music. Fine and dandy, certainly everyone agrees that Jackson's music was great. But the article went on to say that the show, scheduled for the Las Vegas casino, MGM's Mirage, would be "more akin to a theme park attraction" and would include a "nightclub and restaurant with a Michael Jackson theme." Got me wondering just what would be on that menu...

Let's see, after years of getting beaten by his evil father who used him as a cash cow from the age of three, Jackson spent his childhood on stage, in buses, on trains and planes. As an adult (sort of but not really), he was repeatedly accused of child molestation, causing his music to be banned from the radio and him to be blackballed by the entertainment community and his former fans for the last ten years of his life.  He took powerful drugs to lighten his skin, turning himself into a close approximation of a white woman through so many plastic surgery procedures that his nose all but fell off.  Ultimately he died at the fairly young age of 50 from an overdose of prescription drugs.

There was more: The fantasy compound he built for himself and named Neverland, complete with giraffes and amusement park rides on the property; his thwarted attempt to purchase the remains of the Elephant Man; his odd relationships that resulted in three children he essentially bought from their mothers who posed briefly as marital partners.

So now let's all take a moment to imagine that nightclub and restaurant with "a Michael Jackson theme." I'll tell you right now, when I'm in Vegas, I am not eating there.